View Full Version : Pick up lines
racedoll
01-10-2010, 07:54 AM
A friend of mine was being goofy the other day at work and used a couple pick up lines. One was really good, the other I would have smacked him if he would have really tried to use it.
Without giving all them away, what are your favorite pick up lines?
EpyonXero
01-10-2010, 08:25 AM
I wanna hear the one that worked. ;)
this airforce milf im friends with is rather fond of the old ''nice shoes, wanna fuck?'' :lol:
goof2
01-10-2010, 10:01 AM
I wanna hear the one that worked. ;)
Same here, the ones that I know would be reliably ineffective if I used them. Rather than use lines I just talk.
Same here, the ones that I know would be reliably ineffective if I used them. Rather than use lines I just talk.
exactly, if you can throw her for a loop in the first sentance you can almost always get a decent convo going. Asking a girl how big the couch in the ladies room is usually has some interesting results :lol:
G-Rex
01-10-2010, 10:56 AM
This one worked for me.
"Hi." :)
Captain Morgan
01-10-2010, 11:22 AM
This one worked for me.
"Hi." :)
Seems to have worked for me this past weekend, too.
Seems to have worked for me this past weekend, too.
yeah cap! sooo pics?
Amber Lamps
01-10-2010, 11:51 AM
"Excuse me, could you hold on a second? I just want to get a better look at the goods! Beautiful!"
Cheesy, yet strangely effective. Works best if you've noticed the girl checking you out and especially if she and her friends have done a couple fly byes trying to get your attention. You lightly grab her hand and deliver the line with a grin (not a leer) while obviously looking her over without pausing too long over the obvious parts. I always open with a compliment of some kind and explain that , "I would never forgive myself if I went home tonight without at least talking to you and finding out what kind of person lives beneath that beautiful shell."
Amorok
01-10-2010, 11:56 AM
Mine was always "Hi, you're really attractive and I'd like to talk to you for a minute, what are you drinking?"
Captain Morgan
01-10-2010, 11:57 AM
yeah cap! sooo pics?
:lol: Nope, no pics, but she's pretty hot.
Amber Lamps
01-10-2010, 12:01 PM
:lol: Nope, no pics, but she's pretty hot.
Well, it's obvious that you didn't meet her on POF!!!
racedoll
01-10-2010, 01:43 PM
Come on guys (and gals). I know you have some good ones.
Captain Morgan
01-10-2010, 01:57 PM
Come on guys (and gals). I know you have some good ones.
Seriously, "hi" seems to work just fine. But if you want to hear some really cheesy ones that will get a guy slapped...
If you and I were both squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?
If your left leg was lunch and your right leg was dinner, could I snack between meals?
I do have one that actually worked several years ago, but haven't tried it since cause it just seems too corny...thought about dusting it off recently, though.
See a girl that catches your interest and walk up to her, act surprised and say, "hey gorgeous, haven't seen you in awhile, what are you doing here? (or how have you been?)" followed up with, "oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else," then smile and walk away. If she stops you from walking away, go ahead and talk to her. If she's not fast enough on her feet, then just give her a smile the next time you walk by. She'll most likely stop you this time. It's worked in the past for me. :shrug:
Captain Morgan
01-10-2010, 02:00 PM
Wow, just saw a McDonald's commercial where the guy asks a girl if she's heard about the new McDonald's dollar menu. Really?
LeeNetworX
01-10-2010, 02:17 PM
I want to lick you where you pee.
I wanna make tea with your dirty panties!
Amber Lamps
01-10-2010, 04:59 PM
If she is rubbing up against you while dancing... "If you wake it up, you have to put it back to sleep!"
Tsunami
01-10-2010, 05:39 PM
I wanna make tea with your dirty panties!
Gross!
I cant' think of any good pick up lines...
Last one I remember was when some guy came up and started petting Puggy and asked if we wanted to take her for a walk together and when I said no, he asked for me to go meet him for a drink. Which caught me by surprise because I thought he was gay.
Homeslice
01-10-2010, 05:50 PM
Last one I remember was when some guy came up and started petting Puggy and asked if we wanted to take her for a walk together .
That does sound rather gay :lol:
t-homo
01-10-2010, 07:55 PM
That does sound rather gay :lol:
For sure.
askmrjesus
01-10-2010, 08:37 PM
What's a girl like you, doing in a nice place like this?
You look just that girl on Mork and Mindy. I had a huge crush on her.
I have a hundred thousand signatures demanding you go home with me tonight.
JC
goof2
01-10-2010, 09:02 PM
You look just that girl on Mork and Mindy. I had a huge crush on her.
That must have worked really well back in 1981. Did you wear rainbow suspenders too?:lol:
askmrjesus
01-10-2010, 09:13 PM
That must have worked really well back in 1981. Did you wear rainbow suspenders too?:lol:
You don't understand how this whole thing works.
If you want to start a conversation, you don't reference some current bimbo, any idiot can do that. The trick is to make a statement that requires a question in response.
Then again, if the question you get in response is, "Why are you staking me?", you may have to tweak your statement a bit...
JC
racedoll
01-10-2010, 09:15 PM
I might have this one wrong but it was the one my friend said that would have gotten him smacked (or anyone else).
Is that a keg behind you, because I'd like to tap that ____.
OneNotSoSickPsycho
01-10-2010, 09:20 PM
"If you were a pirate, would you put your parrot on this shoulder, (closest towards you) or THIS shoulder?? (reach around and put your arm around her on her shoulder). :lol:
This is SOOO cheesy and hilarious. Works everytime....guaranteed. ;)
I don't use lines, I just knock my women to the ground. Worked pretty well for me.
goof2
01-10-2010, 09:59 PM
You don't understand how this whole thing works.
If you want to start a conversation, you don't reference some current bimbo, any idiot can do that. The trick is to make a statement that requires a question in response.
Then again, if the question you get in response is, "Why are you staking me?", you may have to tweak your statement a bit...
JC
I understand what you are saying, but "How fucking old are you?" is not a great response either.
Captain Morgan
01-10-2010, 11:02 PM
I understand what you are saying, but "How fucking old are you?" is not a great response either.
meh, the girl I met up with didn't have that response. She was a little surprised to find out I'm 36 (as I was to find out she's only 23) but she didn't take off running. :shrug:
'let me buy you a double' (and then one more, and she should be good to go)
Amber Lamps
01-10-2010, 11:58 PM
meh, the girl I met up with didn't have that response. She was a little surprised to find out I'm 36 (as I was to find out she's only 23) but she didn't take off running. :shrug:
You'd be surprised... You my friend are in the zone. Old enough that they can be "fathered" by you and feel secure. You are mature without being old. When I was in my 30s I honestly pulled a lot of early 20s ass because they were tired of jerks their own age and felt that they needed someone older and wiser. "Old enough to know how and young enough to still do it"
t-homo
01-11-2010, 12:09 AM
You'd be surprised... You my friend are in the zone. Old enough that they can be "fathered" by you and feel secure. You are mature without being old. When I was in my 30s I honestly pulled a lot of early 20s ass because they were tired of jerks their own age and felt that they needed someone older and wiser. "Old enough to know how and young enough to still do it"
That is just because they haven't figured out you old fucks are just in it for the sex too.
Ewww, somebody farted, lets get out of here
Welcome to earth (wait for response) oh really? I thought you were an angel
Were you just staring at my crotch?
Can I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?
(walk up to a girl and put your arm around her) Hey Jenny (replies shes not jenny) Oh shit you look like my friend Jenny, shes in town doing a photo shootfor Maxim
I'm an organ donor and mine is a perfect match for you
You look wet, wanna party?
I don't really recommend trying to use any of these though
fnfalman
01-11-2010, 01:22 AM
"You want me to stick my tongue up your ass and whistle Yankee Doodle?"
fnfalman
01-11-2010, 01:23 AM
That is just because they haven't figured out you old fucks are just in it for the sex too.
They know. But they figure they'd get some gourmet meals and maybe some pretty trinkets from Tiffany as well from us old fucks than maybe leftover pizzas from you young punks.:lol
lauralynne
01-11-2010, 01:27 AM
My magic watch tells me you don't have on panties. (Girl: But I AM wearing panties.) Oh, it must be running an hour fast.
LeeNetworX
01-11-2010, 09:10 AM
I don't use lines, I just knock my women to the ground. Worked pretty well for me.
:lol
Rider
01-11-2010, 09:14 AM
I've never used pick up lines before.
One I find funny though: You must be the official here... because you've officially given me wood.
Krabill
01-11-2010, 09:14 AM
About breakfast . . . do you want me to call you, or nudge you?
Cruzergirl
01-11-2010, 09:17 AM
The only line that ever worked for me at a bar (yes, it worked, really worked :lol: )
He brought me a rose made out of a cocktail napkin and told me it was the next most beautiful thing in the bar.
Makes me laugh even now. That was a great night! :lol:
EpyonXero
01-11-2010, 09:52 AM
My magic watch tells me you don't have on panties. (Girl: But I AM wearing panties.) Oh, it must be running an hour fast.
:lol: Thats a good one.
:lol
hey it worked, I married her. LOL
the chi
01-11-2010, 12:48 PM
hey it worked, I married her. LOL
She was still dazed by the blow to her skull.
Phenix_Rider
01-11-2010, 01:12 PM
:lol
Too funny! :lol: I seem to remember doing that a few times :p
http://i187.photobucket.com/albums/x166/Phenix_Rider/caveman-carry-girl.gif
She was still dazed by the blow to her skull.
She had 7 years to get over it. I guess I caused some brain damage.
racedoll
01-11-2010, 10:28 PM
Is that a mirror in your pocket, because I see myself in your pants.
'I've got 10 inches, and 20 million dollars'
Here's the WORST pickup line I think I've ever heard. And I just heard it today!!!
Guy who used to work with me came in to pick up his final paycheck. He's been asking me out ever since he found out I'm seperated, which creeped me out to begin with since I was pretty much seperated for 3 weeks at the time. Anyway, I told him no deal on anything other than friendship and he said, while walking out the door "I guess I'll just have to keep asking you out and when you finally say yes I'll have to get you drunk!" :wtfru:
How's THAT for smooth!?! :lol: He might as well have said "I just want to fuck, you in or not?"
How's THAT for smooth!?! :lol: He might as well have said "I just want to fuck, you in or not?"
Well did it work?
We all have learned that cruizer girl gets easily distracted by oragami, you never what will work.
Gas Man
01-12-2010, 01:06 AM
Pick up lines?
Tigger don't use no pick up lines...
in action:
NWS (http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l311/cjclark69/Posting/fistoffury.gif)
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Rangerscott
01-12-2010, 01:10 AM
Pick up lines?
Tigger don't use no pick up lines...
in action:
NWS (http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l311/cjclark69/Posting/fistoffury.gif)
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
I'll take What is cavity search for $500.
Well did it work?
We all have learned that cruizer girl gets easily distracted by oragami, you never what will work.
Oh for sure. I cleared my desk and was buns up kneeling in no time flat!
Dumb ass. :lol
Kerry_129
01-12-2010, 01:35 AM
Huh-huh.... bewbies.... huh-huh-huh... :drool:
Tsunami
01-12-2010, 02:26 AM
Oh for sure. I cleared my desk and was buns up kneeling in no time flat!
Dumb ass. :lol
:lol
Oh for sure. I cleared my desk and was buns up kneeling in no time flat!
Dumb ass. :lol
So, it worked? Cuz that sounds kinda hot
Particle Man
01-12-2010, 09:14 AM
Oh for sure. I cleared my desk and was buns up kneeling in no time flat!
Dumb ass. :lol
hahahahahahahahaha :lmao:
CrazyKell
01-12-2010, 10:12 AM
Guy came up to me and said "Hi I'm Chris." to which I replied "Nice to meet you I'm Kelly" then he said "You look familiar. Have we slept together before?" :lmao: Had me laughing my ass off.
Captain Morgan
01-12-2010, 01:26 PM
Guy came up to me and said "Hi I'm Chris." to which I replied "Nice to meet you I'm Kelly" then he said "You look familiar. Have we slept together before?" :lmao: Had me laughing my ass off.
How did it end? ;)
askmrjesus
01-12-2010, 01:37 PM
I took a girl home from a bar, by pretending I was from Australia.
Cheesy accent, shrimps on the barbie, the whole nine yards.
The next morning...I forgot I was supposed to be from Australia, (Tequila will do that).
She was kinda pissed, in a "I don't ever want to see you again, and I hope you die" sorta way. :lol:
JC
Amber Lamps
01-12-2010, 01:43 PM
Pick up lines?
Tigger don't use no pick up lines...
in action:
NWS (http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l311/cjclark69/Posting/fistoffury.gif)
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Holy Shit Chris! When did you photograph me you bastard?!?!
EpyonXero
01-12-2010, 01:57 PM
Guy came up to me and said "Hi I'm Chris." to which I replied "Nice to meet you I'm Kelly" then he said "You look familiar. Have we slept together before?" :lmao: Had me laughing my ass off.
Were you still lauging the next morning? redflip
CrazyKell
01-12-2010, 02:05 PM
How did it end? ;)
Were you still lauging the next morning? redflip
Not the next morning, months later, but it still gives me a laugh every time I think about it. ;)
Gas Man
01-13-2010, 12:42 AM
Holy Shit Chris! When did you photograph me you bastard?!?!
:lol
Not the next morning, months later, but it still gives me a laugh every time I think about it. ;)
So did you give him your number?
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