The Official Zombie Plan Thread

[dReWpY]

Made this to not bog down the The Walking Dead Thread
http://www.woosk.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/zombie-plan.jpg
http://www.deviantart.com/download/95863751/Zombie_Plan_by_BioHazaRd_Apocalypse.jpg
Mine involves cross bows, boats and semi-auto shotguns

[Particle Man]

Don't forget booze and chainsaws.

[Dave]

My GOTH collection so far involves several thousand rounds of 7.62x39. Some weapons of various types, a geiger counter, and some cast off class 2 vests :lol:

[dReWpY]

problem with chainsaws is that it splatters, and ill be damned if i want zombie goo splashing all around me... but damn it is such a sweet melee weapon.

[Trip]

chainsaws require gas. Gas will go away in a few months.

I am stocking up on crossbows and arrows. Also some swords for close quarters. Probably rapiers and katanas. Guns will be a fall back for needing quick action or defending against mob zombies.

[derf]

I'm just gonna stick to the general rape and pillaging. I'll keep some handguns shotguns and rifles in my stormchasers type car. Then I figure I can go out in a blaze of glory when my time comes.

[Gas Man]

Hatchet and axe

Basic zombie tools!

[Apoc]

Cocaine and a 12 guage. Lots of reloads for both.

[caveman]

Just need to remember where the nearest reserve or Nat Guard HQ is and go hit the armory there and grab some Humvees. Take it to the depot shop, here in Michigan is in Warren, and attach some armor plating to the exterior. Also find a few duece and a halfs and a hemt tank truck for fuel all of this driven of course by Gas Man, Uma, my old lady, and perhaps two other neighbor households. #'s must have #'s. safer as a group to fight off not just the zombies but those that are ill prepared.

[tallywacker]

Just need to remember where the nearest reserve or Nat Guard HQ is and go hit the armory there and grab some Humvees. Take it to the depot shop, here in Michigan is in Warren, and attach some armor plating to the exterior. Also find a few duece and a halfs and a hemt tank truck for fuel all of this driven of course by Gas Man, Uma, my old lady, and perhaps two other neighbor households. #'s must have #'s. safer as a group to fight off not just the zombies but those that are ill prepared.

I'm set, the factory here makes MRAP's and the military base rebuilds artillery guns.

[derf]

Cocaine and a 12 guage. Lots of reloads for both.

Added cocaine to my zombie plan, good call.

[dReWpY]

never tried it, but it sounds like a good addition to a zombie plan...

[tallywacker]

I was actually hoping this was a COD zombie strategy discussion thread

[Rangerscott]

I was actually hoping this was a COD zombie strategy discussion thread

Nerd.

[derf]

never tried it, but it sounds like a good addition to a zombie plan...

You should, everybody needs to have a 3 day bender once in a while and wake up in a room full of strippers in various states of dress with a pile of blow on a glass table perfectly shaped like mickey mouse.

[Apoc]

never tried it, but it sounds like a good addition to a zombie plan...

I just figure i'll wanna be alert, paranoid, and shooting at anything that moves.

Yes, I want to be that guy.

Oh, and its really not that good. But you can drink like an Irish champ on it.

[tallywacker]

Nerd.

Zombie nerd

[Apoc]

Zombie nerd

See who's a 'Zombie Nerd' when your a mindless flesh eating corpse, and were coked out warriors of destruction, splattering your brains all over your Yamahahahaha.

[Captain Morgan]

I agree with caveman. I'll hit up the nearest military unit for some vehicles. Those things don't require keys. Hope I still remember how the fuck to start em.

[tallywacker]

See who's a 'Zombie Nerd' when your a mindless flesh eating corpse, and were coked out warriors of destruction, splattering your brains all over your Yamahahahaha.

I'm more prepared than most of you haha. I have a pretty respectable personal armory and stockpile of ammo.

[Tmall]

I'd wait em out. The cold, the heat and bugs would get em all...

[Tmall]

I'm more prepared than most of you haha. I have a pretty respectable personal armory and stockpile of ammo.

Because Cunucks don't have guns.. I don't know a house without a shotgun and multiple rifles..

[tallywacker]

Because Cunucks don't have guns.. I don't know a house without a shotgun and multiple rifles..

WTF are you talking about?

[Apoc]

I'd wait em out. The cold, the heat and bugs would get em all...

Wait em out? You know damn well its gonna originate in a port city. You might be at ground zero!

[TommyHotWheel]

The Zombie Survival Guide is a very good friend.

[Apoc]

The Zombie Survival Guide is a very good friend.

Guides are for women and children. Men learn by playing video games.

[TommyHotWheel]

Guides are for women and children. Men learn by playing video games.

Blah blah blah...zombies dont disappear when you throw maple syrup and Tim Horton's donuts at them...Eh'.:lol That reminds me tho...Black Ops has a zombie mode...gotta pick that up.

[TommyHotWheel]

Wait em out? You know damn well its gonna originate in a port city. You might be at ground zero!

I'm fucked if thats the case...3 sides of water and the combined might of the World's mightiest fighting forces...controlled by the U.S. Government...yep, I'm properly fucked.

[Dave]

I agree with caveman. I'll hit up the nearest military unit for some vehicles. Those things don't require keys. Hope I still remember how the fuck to start em.

and you guys will meet a short end. deadly force is authorized in the protection of govt equipment.

[Trip]

I don't agree with most zombie movies and games. You need to eliminate the entire head. Swords and other head severing methods are more likely to stop a zombie than some bullets to the brain. If they can survive with good portions of bits and bobs below the brain gone, they can surive with major brain damage as well. Eliminating a zombie by rifle would require extreme amounts of regular ammo. Best course, remove the entire head.

[Gas Man]

Exactly trip. Plus ammo runs out, zombies don't. My bil NastyNate says it best. U need hand tools. Hell didn't woody prove that in zombie land?

[Gas Man]

But I shud note. It is worth the effort to grab ur military enlisted buddies or vets. They know certain things us civilians might not. Like how to piss off ur neighbors but still blame ur buddy who was out of town. Tts some tricky shit ya know. Stealthy military crazy ass shit. Right cave? :lol

[derf]

But I shud note. It is worth the effort to grab ur military enlisted buddies or vets. They know certain things us civilians might not. Like how to piss off ur neighbors but still blame ur buddy who was out of town. Tts some tricky shit ya know. Stealthy military crazy ass shit. Right cave? :lol

Sounds liek a good story huh?

[defector]

I got my Pit Bull and my Staffy for early warning. (Zombies don't eat dogs, as far as I know). I got old people for bait (or if I need a quick escape), and I got clubbing and slicing weapons, and ammo for the firearms. Since I have access to tractor trailers and box trucks, I should start to outfit one or two of them as a mobile command unit. I think I might need a boat, just in case.

[the chi]

Dude, zombies eat anything with flesh. Why dont you think there are ever really any animals around in the movies? Only the ones who get away dont get eaten. :lol:

Lemme see...our's is just in the prelim stages, we haven't given it alot of prep yet, but obviously, based on my dream, it needs work.

We've got the guns. Need to stock up on ammo. Hand tools like axes and swords are best, like Trip said, it would waste ammo trying to blow a whole head off if the bullet aint big enough. We've got those too, and machetes. The issue for me would be strength. Obviously I need to start lifting weights if I plan on severing some heads.

Medical supplies would be a must. Def need the face masks to make sure while chopping zombies we dont get infected.

Never trap yourself in a place with no back door. You always need an exit, be it a window, door, or secret tunnel you can collapse behind you with dynamite or explosives, or by hand if all else fails to crush the zombies at just the right time, buying some time to escape.

I'm thinking head for the woods, natl parks or something similar. Build treehouses in the big trees, leaving no way to climb up except rope ladders. Zombies arent intelligent enough to figure out to climb the tree. If they cant knock it down, they'll lose interest. Need to create tree roads too, so you can travel safely through the trees versus making bait of yourself on the ground.

Need a close knit crew to watch your back, but only people you can trust implicitly. Not ones that would throw you to the ghouls to save themselves. Family, close friends only.

I'll think of more later.

[Apoc]

The notion of the Hollywood zombie is highly improbable anyway,.

And thats why you will be among the first turned!

[VatorMan]

Hand tools are nice-but who wants Zombie guts and tainted blood splattering everywhere? You need long range weapons and a free fire zone. Movement sensors with a select amount of trip wires and land mines. A large moat of Sulphuric Acid would be nice as well. i know all that takes time so start now !

[dReWpY]

i like the sulfuric acid moat idea...

[VatorMan]

i like the sulfuric acid moat idea...

Yea, that takes care of the fast vs slow zombie thing. Acid don't care. :lol

[Apoc]

i like the sulfuric acid moat idea...

Around a castle. With Vampires in it.

[dReWpY]

lets not talk crazy, everyone knows there is no such thing as vampires...

[Apoc]

lets not talk crazy, everyone knows there is no such thing as vampires...

You obviously dont watch enough TV. They are all over the place.

[dReWpY]

do you think they will have ice zombies in the next apocolypes

[VatorMan]

You obviously dont watch enough TV. They are all over the place.

As long as they aren't those gay assed Twilight sparkly vampires-I can deal with that.

[Apoc]

do you think they will have ice zombies in the next apocolypes

I hope so, itll gimme a reason to play with a flamethrower!

I'm expecting it in Dec/2012. The end of the world caused not by war and destruction, but by brain eating! Cant wait!

[Dave]

Dude, zombies eat anything with flesh. Why dont you think there are ever really any animals around in the movies? Only the ones who get away dont get eaten. :lol:

Lemme see...our's is just in the prelim stages, we haven't given it alot of prep yet, but obviously, based on my dream, it needs work.

We've got the guns. Need to stock up on ammo. Hand tools like axes and swords are best, like Trip said, it would waste ammo trying to blow a whole head off if the bullet aint big enough. We've got those too, and machetes. The issue for me would be strength. Obviously I need to start lifting weights if I plan on severing some heads.

Medical supplies would be a must. Def need the face masks to make sure while chopping zombies we dont get infected.

Never trap yourself in a place with no back door. You always need an exit, be it a window, door, or secret tunnel you can collapse behind you with dynamite or explosives, or by hand if all else fails to crush the zombies at just the right time, buying some time to escape.

I'm thinking head for the woods, natl parks or something similar. Build treehouses in the big trees, leaving no way to climb up except rope ladders. Zombies arent intelligent enough to figure out to climb the tree. If they cant knock it down, they'll lose interest. Need to create tree roads too, so you can travel safely through the trees versus making bait of yourself on the ground.

Need a close knit crew to watch your back, but only people you can trust implicitly. Not ones that would throw you to the ghouls to save themselves. Family, close friends only.

I'll think of more later.

Ghouls, you a sluggy freelance fan rae? Or maybe hellsing?

[VatorMan]

Has anyone figured out the hot/cold thing? I mean do Zombies function better in either climate? I would think Zombies would like the cold as that would slow decay, but it also would make for thick blood and make them sluggish. You would either need to head to Canada or the Amazon based on the answer.

[dReWpY]

rapid decay would be ideal, but it would also speed up the rate of infection of any cuts or blisters accrued during escape/ survival of the the non-infected

[TommyHotWheel]

Slow moving zombies freeze(not to death), and if they are the 28 Days Later kind, should freeze to death if cold enough.

[the chi]

Ghouls, you a sluggy freelance fan rae? Or maybe hellsing?

Im gonna say no, since I have no idea what you are talking about.

:lol:

Has anyone figured out the hot/cold thing? I mean do Zombies function better in either climate? I would think Zombies would like the cold as that would slow decay, but it also would make for thick blood and make them sluggish. You would either need to head to Canada or the Amazon based on the answer.


Thinking the cold would make the flesh freeze and harden, making it impossible to continue moving...but if defrosted would probably kick back up again.

[VatorMan]

Im gonna say no, since I have no idea what you are talking about.

:lol:




Thinking the cold would make the flesh freeze and harden, making it impossible to continue moving...but if defrosted would probably kick back up again.

But then you have that whole decay thing. It would be hard to be a Zombie. :tremble:

[the chi]

Yeah, I was thinking along the lines of regular temps and/or hot temps the flesh would rapidly decay, fall off the bones, and then they'd no longer have the ability to move the bones, therefore just staying in place till they are a bubbling mass of putrescence.

BUT, then you'd end the story cuz if they rot that fast, they cant infect humans who can get away, thus bringing about their own extinction. The virus or whatever would die out and humans could begin to repop. Unless the virus mutated, became airborne and everybody died. :shrug: Haven't found a good answer.

[Inferno]

If and when the Zombies come...you can call me a damn durty Canadian. The farther north, the better.
Also, I am gonna get some grape seeds, yeast and sugar. Bow and arrow, water filtration and a machette/leatherman.

[VatorMan]

As a Zombie-I would set up shop in a deep cave. I'd haul ass (28 day zombie) get my infecting and brain eating done early in the morning then back to the cave to slow decay. Place with most caves would be the Kentucky/Tennessee area, but that area's brain quality is suspect. Damn. Still haven't figured it out yet.

[Mudpuppy]

i have a gun with one clip equaling 10 rounds in it

i will find one of you apocalypse guerrilla wanna be motherfuckers
i will shoot you in the fucking balls once
i will walk up and just for personal amusement i will break your arm in 6 places
i will rip your eye out and sodomize the empty eye socket repeatedly
i will then rip your head off and shit down your throat for good measure
i will take all your weapons in search of non-zombie women to repopulate the earth

end of plan

[dReWpY]

mooch....

[Mudpuppy]

mooch....

yes and if it is you Dru-P I will pull both eyes out and run you over with the less than Imprezza..

[dReWpY]

Note to self, incase of zombies, lace jerky with poison and place around perimiter
Check: mudpuppy avoidance plan complete
.lol

[KSGregman]

Place with most caves would be the Kentucky/Tennessee area, but that area's brain quality is suspect. Damn.


Nice :lmao: :rofl: :lol:

[Smittie61984]

http://suzysbookshelf.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Movies_Movies_Z_Zombie_Strippers__010771_.jpg

[VatorMan]

All you suckers think you are going to survive ? HA. I'm a realist. I plan on being the best damn Zombie I can be.

[Papa_Complex]

Added cocaine to my zombie plan, good call.

Make it Ritalin. Coke screws with long range aim. With Ritalin; one shot one kill.

The Plan: Shack up with Mila Jovovich and let her do all the zombie killin'

[Apoc]

Make it Ritalin. Coke screws with long range aim. With Ritalin; one shot one kill.

The Plan: Shack up with Mila Jovovich and let her do all the zombie killin'

If im shacked up with Milla Jovovich, there aint gonna be much time for Zombie killin'

[TommyHotWheel]

Hey, if I plug one in the chest and it doesn't fall, rest assured I'll aim for the head next...



Supernatural fan?

Hell yeah...its like an instructional booklet on TV.

[Trip]

Then you're left with a bunch of twitching, biting zombie heads that you have to shoot or smash anyway. Assuming that a semi-intact brain and nervous system is all a zombie needs to function, then loss of its body won't kill the head. May as well splatter its brains while the head is still attached and save yourself a step.

You wouldn't have to shoot or smash. You could use them as soccer balls. Just make sure you are wearing steel toe.

[derf]

Make it Ritalin. Coke screws with long range aim. With Ritalin; one shot one kill.


I'm hoping i'll be too strung out to really give a shit

[Papa_Complex]

If im shacked up with Milla Jovovich, there aint gonna be much time for Zombie killin'

Get yer own skinny ex-supermodel.She'll have plenty of time to kill zombies after I roll over and go to sleep.

[Amber Lamps]

If im shacked up with Milla Jovovich, there aint gonna be much time for Zombie killin'

Yea I don't think that 3 min and 13 seconds is going to matter that much...:lol:

[Trip]

So if you ran across someone like Jessica Alba that was zombified, would you risk zombification to plunk it in there?

[Papa_Complex]

Yea I don't think that 3 min and 13 seconds is going to matter that much...:lol:

Hey, as long as I get mine....

So if you ran across someone like Jessica Alba that was zombified, would you risk zombification to plunk it in there?

Naw. Alba is for re-population, not survival.

[Inferno]

So if you ran across someone like Jessica Alba that was zombified, would you risk zombification to plunk it in there?

NyesnonyesNyesyesNoNyes....ohh crap maybe

[Gas Man]

Depends: how long has she been dead?
Could I properly restrain her?

[Trip]

Naw. Alba is for re-population, not survival.

Doesn't have to be Alba, it could just be a random hot celebrity you always wanted to nail.

You don't know how long she has been zombified, but she still looks similarly like she did when she was alive. I am not asking a hypothetical on a disgusting zombie, that defeats the whole argument. She is however a true blue zombie that is incapable of speech and only wants to eat you, not mid conversion.

You can restrain her anyway you like.

[TommyHotWheel]

I fucked a zombie, an evil, dead, lifeless husk of a human...I lost my humanity, my soul and she destroyed my brain so I could not think or act rationally...then she divorced me and fucked up the rest of my life...:lol

[Trip]

lol nice tommy

[Mudpuppy]

Note to self, incase of zombies, lace jerky with poison and place around perimiter
Check: mudpuppy avoidance plan complete
.lol

that is a great plan and for sure even if i had advance notice i would fall for it and end up dying of poison..

[dReWpY]

I fucked a zombie, an evil, dead, lifeless husk of a human...I lost my humanity, my soul and she destroyed my brain so I could not think or act rationally...then she divorced me and fucked up the rest of my life...:lol

Zombies= Taters whore of a exwife walking

[Papa_Complex]

Doesn't have to be Alba, it could just be a random hot celebrity you always wanted to nail.

You don't know how long she has been zombified, but she still looks similarly like she did when she was alive. I am not asking a hypothetical on a disgusting zombie, that defeats the whole argument. She is however a true blue zombie that is incapable of speech and only wants to eat you, not mid conversion.

You can restrain her anyway you like.

Well Alba would be way up my list, but I doubt the risk would be necessary. I figure that geeks with guns and sharp implements, who played role playing games as a kid, and read a lot of horror, sci-fi, and fantasy will be a hot commodity when the zombie apocalypse hits the fan. Who else would give a hot chick a better chance of survival; some bodybuilder meat-head who wants to look like a hero, instead of surviving?

[Amber Lamps]

Well Alba would be way up my list, but I doubt the risk would be necessary. I figure that geeks with guns and sharp implements, who played role playing games as a kid, and read a lot of horror, sci-fi, and fantasy will be a hot commodity when the zombie apocalypse hits the fan. Who else would give a hot chick a better chance of survival; some bodybuilder meat-head who wants to look like a hero, instead of surviving?

Hmmm.... I think someone who is in the middle of the two extremes such as myself. :wink: Not some scrawny wimp/nerd but not totally without technical skills. Also, I think that an actual WORKER in a field might be preferable to some one who only dealt with concepts... like an engineer, for example. **cough** Trip **cough, cough**

[Apoc]

Well Alba would be way up my list, but I doubt the risk would be necessary. I figure that geeks with guns and sharp implements, who played role playing games as a kid, and read a lot of horror, sci-fi, and fantasy will be a hot commodity when the zombie apocalypse hits the fan. Who else would give a hot chick a better chance of survival; some bodybuilder meat-head who wants to look like a hero, instead of surviving?

Chances are she'd charge the geek with keeping them alive, while she screwed the meathead.

[Amber Lamps]

Chances are she'd charge the geek with keeping them alive, while she screwed the meathead.

Truth! College degrees will be pretty worthless after the zombie apocalypse... Besides, I still think that it will be the eggheads fault the whole thing got started.

[Papa_Complex]

Chances are she'd charge the geek with keeping them alive, while she screwed the meathead.

Then the hottie and the meathead die, while I go looking for a librarian.

[Apoc]

Then the hottie and the meathead die, while I go looking for a librarian.

Then they die having sex, and you die having books thrown at you. Because at that point, thats all theyll be good for.

[Papa_Complex]

Then they die having sex, and you die having books thrown at you. Because at that point, thats all theyll be good for.

There death is assured, based on every slasher and zombie movie I've seen. Mine isn't.

You would be surprised what I've learnt from books. Things like making gunpowder, primers, and thermite for example. I've met some pretty hot librarians too.

[Apoc]

There death is assured, based on every slasher and zombie movie I've seen. Mine isn't.

You would be surprised what I've learnt from books. Things like making gunpowder, primers, and thermite for example. I've met some pretty hot librarians too.


I've learned a lot from books too. But when the Zombalypse happens, i'm gonna be a coke fueled, meth crazed, paranoid warrior of destruction, not Stephen fuckin' Hawking!

[Papa_Complex]

I've learned a lot from books too. But when the Zombalypse happens, i'm gonna be a coke fueled, meth crazed, paranoid warrior of destruction, not Stephen fuckin' Hawking!

Oddly enough there are a few steps between a genius in an electric wheelchair and a crazed, steroid and cocaine whacked dude in a hockey mask, with a chainsaw.

[Apoc]

Oddly enough there are a few steps between a genius in an electric wheelchair and a crazed, steroid and cocaine whacked dude in a hockey mask, with a chainsaw.

Im guessing infection would be enough of a worry without accidently causing a wound with a needle. I might skip the steroids with this one, and go hard on the stimulants. :lol:

[Papa_Complex]

Im guessing infection would be enough of a worry without accidently causing a wound with a needle. I might skip the steroids with this one, and go hard on the stimulants. :lol:

You know, it's not that I have anything against coked-up guys in hockey masks and swinging chainsaws. It's just that when they go down, which they inevitably do, they make for really big zombies that have to be taken out.

[Apoc]

You know, it's not that I have anything against coked-up guys in hockey masks and swinging chainsaws. It's just that when they go down, which they inevitably do, they make for really big zombies that have to be taken out.


We are all fucked anyway. Zombies eat brains. That means a few dozen zombies could clean out the USA within a few days. They'll be moving north by the millions for the main course.

[VatorMan]

We are all fucked anyway. Zombies eat brains. That means a few dozen zombies could clean out the USA within a few days. They'll be moving north by the millions for the main course.

Sorry dude-Canada is a step below Kentucky. The Northeast corridor USA is gonna be Zombie paradise. Set up shop in Boston you get Harvard, Yale, and MIT brains. The Champagne region of brains if you will.

[Apoc]

1."Cardio"[7]
2."Double tap"[8] ("Ziploc bags" in a deleted scene)[7]
3."Beware of bathrooms"[7][9]
4."Wear seatbelts"[7]
6."Cast iron skillet"
7."Travel light"
8."Get a kickass partner"
12."Bounty paper towels"
15."Bowling Ball"
17."(Don't) be a hero"[10]
18."Limber up"
21."Avoid strip clubs"
22."When in doubt, know your way out"
29."The buddy system"
31."Check the back seat"[11]
32."Enjoy the little things"[12]
33."Swiss army knife"
48."Hygiene"[13]