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View Full Version : Hello, 911? I'm a retard, can you help me?

askmrjesus
10-12-2011, 11:18 AM
Mass. family lost in corn maze calls 911

October 12, 2011 10:46 AM

A family in Massachusetts got an unexpected adventure after getting lost in a corn maze.

Police got a 911 call from a woman who was trapped in the Connors Farm maze in Danvers, Mass., after closing time Monday evening.

She said it was supposed to be fun, but quickly became a nightmare.

On the 911 call, the woman says, "I don't see anybody. I'm really scared. It's really dark and we got a 3-week-old baby with us.

The operator replies, "Just relax, calm down. You husband's with you right?"

She replies, "Yes, but my baby --- "

The operator responds, "I understand. And a police officer is on the way."

"Early Show" co-anchor Jeff Glor reported it didn't take long for police to find the family and escort them out of the maze to safety. As it turns out, they were just 25 feet away from the exit.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/10/12/earlyshow/living/parenting/main20119180.shtml

For fuck sakes people, it's CORN, not concrete.

Idiots.

JC
CasterTroy
10-12-2011, 11:20 AM
"Yes, but my baby --- "



Has some dumbass parents! Run away if you want a shot at normalcy
Tmall
10-12-2011, 11:24 AM
"Yes Ma'am, we're on our way. We're going to start a fire at the entrance side of the maze. Please walk in the opposite direction."
askmrjesus
10-12-2011, 11:33 AM
Has some dumbass parents! Run away if you want a shot at normalcy

Children of the corn? :lol:

JC
azoomm
10-12-2011, 11:35 AM
Here I am, hoping that child isn't theirs...
Particle Man
10-12-2011, 11:43 AM
Wow - just wow.
shmike
10-12-2011, 11:58 AM
Amazing!

Lost in a maiz maze!
fatbuckRTO
10-12-2011, 12:18 PM
Lawsuit pending...
Smittie61984
10-12-2011, 12:26 PM
Whomever this dumbass is should have their priviledge to revoked for a minimum of 4 years. Then they are placed on a probationary period where they can vote only in local elections for another 4. After that, if they haven't done anythign retarded then they can vote again in national elections.
AquaPython
10-12-2011, 01:24 PM
Amazing!

Lost in a maiz maze!

solemnly shaking my head.
Rider
10-12-2011, 01:25 PM
Amazing!

Lost in a maiz maze!

Did you say Maize? Go Blue!
Homeslice
10-12-2011, 01:27 PM
Never been in one of these "mazes"

Can you push yourself thru the stalks, or would you need a machete? :lol:
Smittie61984
10-12-2011, 01:31 PM
Can you push yourself thru the stalks, or would you need a machete? :lol:

Oh yeah. One of the big problems these mazes have is that kids run through the stocks and fuck everything up. It's corn not that harry potter shit that eats you.
TYEster
10-12-2011, 01:41 PM
Whomever this dumbass is should have their priviledge to revoked for a minimum of 4 years. Then they are placed on a probationary period where they can vote only in local elections for another 4. After that, if they haven't done anythign retarded then they can vote again in national elections.

I fully support this being a federal mandate law which can never be protested or changed.
derf
10-12-2011, 07:46 PM
Never been in one of these "mazes"

Can you push yourself thru the stalks, or would you need a machete? :lol:

You can push your way through, it might take some effort but it's possible.


I found audio and video: http://gawker.com/5849241/family-of-three-calls-911-for-corn-maze-rescue
Particle Man
10-12-2011, 07:51 PM
Never been in one of these "mazes"

Can you push yourself thru the stalks, or would you need a machete? :lol:

Easily. It's just corn. We used to play in the corn as kids. Kick ass hide-and-seek.
Smittie61984
10-12-2011, 08:57 PM
I found audio and video: http://gawker.com/5849241/family-of-three-calls-911-for-corn-maze-rescue

After watching that video I stand even more strongly by my statement.

I also think we should put them through S.E.R.E. incase it happens again. It'll be a long term investment since they'll likely need police/fire again.
EpyonXero
10-12-2011, 09:13 PM
Isnt being lost in a maze kind of like mentally locking yourself out of your house?
Rangerscott
10-12-2011, 10:16 PM
Good job on the reporters for not laughing. It's amazing how many humans would roll over and die if something really was going to happen to the earth, be it war or natural disasters.
askmrjesus
10-12-2011, 10:56 PM
Isnt being lost in a maze kind of like mentally locking yourself out of your house?

Ed's fall vacation.

JC
Particle Man
10-13-2011, 07:29 AM
Ed's fall vacation.

JC
:lol: