My thoughts exactly...

[Porkchop]

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/bos/34298447.html

LOL.... my thought exactly

[SoFlaSV]

http://www.soflasportbikes.com/forum/images/smilies/handclap.gif

[t-homo]

Well played. what a douche.

[Dnyce]

:dthumb:

[DLIT]

At the bottom:
"this is in or around Everywhere"

It's funny because it's true.

[BobTheBiker]

I agree with that entirely.

[Particle Man]

The spoiler on the back - That huge spoiler must produce a ton of down-force. That would make for some awesome traction except for the fact that YOUR CAR IS FRONT WHEEL DRIVE. Why are you puttind down force YOUR REAR WHEELS if YOUR CAR IS FRONT WHEEL DRIVE?
Has anybody here ever stood on their rear bumper? What's that do? It pushes the back of the car down, and the front of the car UP. So by putting all of that downforce behind your rear axle, you're adding lift to the front, thereby reducing your traction. Moron

:lmao:

What you were listening to was percussion accompanying a man shouting obscenities in ebonics into a microphone. ahhhhhhahahahahahahahahahahaha :lmao:

[Lamnidae]

i definately agree.

[Smittie61984]

Before a flag gets it

All right, this one finally set me over the edge. On my 7 am commute this morning, I'm sharing the road with a 1999 honda civic. Let me tell you a little about this civic. It was bright orange. It had a big wing on the back, an exhaust pipe wide enough for me to put my arm up it, bass so loud MY windows shook, and it scraped the ground every time it went over a bump.

Here's what I see wrong with this picture:

1). The color - I'm sorry, but if I drove a honda civic, I wouldn't be drawing attention to myself. Not that there's anything wrong with a civic... it's a very economical, fuel effecient car. It's sure better than walking. It's just not a car that I find particularily impressing. If you had a bright orange Maserati, I can understand. But a civic?

And the stickers - I bet you got an extra 10 horsepower just by sticking on that "NOS" sticker. (And btw.. it was painfully obvious you don't have a nitrous system, so stop fooling yourself). Oh, and an irish kid from southie shouldn't have asian characters on his car.

2). The spoiler on the back - That huge spoiler must produce a ton of down-force. That would make for some awesome traction except for the fact that YOUR CAR IS FRONT WHEEL DRIVE. Why are you puttind down force YOUR REAR WHEELS if YOUR CAR IS FRONT WHEEL DRIVE?
Has anybody here ever stood on their rear bumper? What's that do? It pushes the back of the car down, and the front of the car UP. So by putting all of that downforce behind your rear axle, you're adding lift to the front, thereby reducing your traction. Moron.

3). The exhaust pipe - It's great that you have a high-flow exhaust and all, but let's remind ourselves what you're driving: A 1999 honda civic. Cute little 4-banger. Everyone screams about power-to-weight ratio! power-to-weight ratio! Well, when your engine is so small it weighs almost nothing, you get almost no power. Your 1.6L engine is rated at 127 horse-power and just over 100 lb-ft of torque at redline. For those of you who don't know cars, those aren't very impressive numbers. My 99 cent bottle of Coke has better displacement than your engine.

Anyway, back to the exhaust. It's great that you can get an extra 10 horsepower by bolting on a sewer pipe in leiu of a muffler. But guess what? 127 horsepower + 10 horsepower = still a shitty engine. And now your car sounds like a chainsaw on acid.

4). The bass - I refuse to say "your music was so loud..." because what you were listening to was not music. What you were listening to was percussion accompanying a man shouting obscenities in ebonics into a microphone. And why do you need to play it so loud that early in the morning? There's children trying to sleep. Maybe you were trying to drown out that annoying lawnmower note coming from your exhaust?

5). How low can you go - And don't even get me started on your body kit and your suspension drop. Although, it did make me smile when I saw that the front of your "bumper" was all cracked and scraped from every time you have to cross the T tracks on Comm. Ave.

In conclusion - It doesn't matter what color paint, how big your exhaust pipe is, or how much plastic you bolt/glue to the sides of your car, you're still driving a honda civic. You can't hide from this fact. So peel the little plastic things off of your windshield wipers, and just drive your car for what it is...


PLEASE NOTE: This post is not a rant against drivers of honda civics. As I said in item 1, civics are very nice cars. They are dependable, fuel-efficient, and easy to park. My brother had a civic when he was in high school. It was a very nice car. This is a rant against people who think they can make a honda civic more than a honda civic. That is all. Thank you, and good night!


this is in or around Everywhere



I gotta say. I love how Nascar went to Ricer style wings. I know they are affective (In nascar I mean) but still. Those look like the wings you get from Pep Boys!!!

Gotta love the civics though. They are funny as hell to watch when they all gather together.

[Porkchop]

The reason I posted this was because there is a story associated with it.

Two days ago i was hanging out with my "second family"... basically some family friends that I grew up knowing. The parents are dentists and their son is a year younger than me, so were pretty good friends. Well the dad asked us to go out and grab something for him and he told us to take his car... well one of his multiple cars. So we took the SRT8... nothing super special, but it still has a 6.1L, 425 hp V8. Basically a racecar in a tuxedo. Im driving...

So were at a light and a typical civic rolls up next to us. Rims, wing, crappy non-paint matching body kit, boomer can, and two white boys listening to oddly enough, some screaming metal... and the kid hits the gas a couple times... fart, fart, fart. So I do the classic Vin Diesel tilted head slow look over at these douches. Apparently these guys somewhat know cars, cause they noticed the badge on the side.... but not enough to know what they were getting into. (Note- we were on a four lane, separated, semi country road.) Light turns green, the big ass rear wheels break loose, and the V8 roars:drool:. It might have been about 135 when i looked back and these douches are slowing and turning off the road. Me and my friend just laaaughing... they couldnt even face us.

[marko138]

I saw some shit head fitting this describtion about 2 hours ago. Except his Civic wasn't bright orange...it was black...but everything else fit to a T.

[Particle Man]

I love the ones with the expensive rims, huge wing, and bondo for the majority of the body :lol:

[Amorok]

I love when those guys try to race me on my motorcycle. It's an 800cc cruiser and I still spank them all. I actually ran away from one of the rice cars the other day in my 99 Olds Intrigue. The kid's engine was SCREAMING, and I heard him shift all the way up, still couldn't come close. I'm driving a fucking grocery getter with a food delivery sign on the top and leaving you in the dust! Too bad he had an ugly girlfriend, because I'm pretty sure I can bang her now.

[Smittie61984]

Now what would be funny is if someone built the living shit out of a Honda Civic. Then made it a super rice mobile. That'd be the ultimate sleeping non-sleeper.

[PhiSig1071]

I have a friend with the ultimate car for shaming civic's.

'86 Buick Grand National.

Around 130k miles, original turbo, I think the only thing he changed was the wiring harness.

[fatbuckRTO]

Too bad he had an ugly girlfriend, because I'm pretty sure I can bang her now.:lol: :lol:

[tommymac]

I have a friend with the ultimate car for shaming civic's.

'86 Buick Grand National.

Around 130k miles, original turbo, I think the only thing he changed was the wiring harness.

those grand nationals were prety damn fast back in their day. Not sure how tired that motor woud be but i can see them spanking the civics.

Tom

[marko138]

I love when those guys try to race me on my motorcycle. It's an 800cc cruiser and I still spank them all. I actually ran away from one of the rice cars the other day in my 99 Olds Intrigue. The kid's engine was SCREAMING, and I heard him shift all the way up, still couldn't come close. I'm driving a fucking grocery getter with a food delivery sign on the top and leaving you in the dust! Too bad he had an ugly girlfriend, because I'm pretty sure I can bang her now.
:rofl: Nice.

[BICH]

this is the type I had, and in the 90's it moved!!! THE REAL RICE BURNER!!!
no front wheel shit!:rockout:
http://www.dragtimes.com/images/6511-1981-Mazda-RX-7.jpg
http://www.452-engines.com/uploaded_images/Mazda-rx7-1st-generation01-786036.jpghttp://image.superstreetonline.com/f/Rotorhead37/9759916+w320+h240+cr0+re1+ar1/1985-mazda-rx-7-super-street-2007.jpg

[azoomm]

I've seen some real rice racers... not one of them have the ridiculous rear fin that these street racers have. I won't ever understand the want for rear down-force on a front wheel drive car...

[Rsv1000R]

I've seen some real rice racers... not one of them have the ridiculous rear fin that these street racers have. I won't ever understand the want for rear down-force on a front wheel drive car...

Can't see over the wing if it's in front?????

[Smittie61984]

I have a friend with the ultimate car for shaming civic's.

'86 Buick Grand National.


I worked with a guy who had one of those. Ran high 10s. Best part was when he got it in a burnout all you would hear is the turbo.

The best sleeper is a GMC Cyclone. 4.3L Turbo with AWD. Looks like an old man truck or an earler version of the S10 Extreme.

Knew another guy with a 1992 V8 S10. Had a 350 pushing about 450hp or so. It literally looked like an old mans truck because it was an old mans truck. Just an old man who has yet to grow up (And is the master of smack talk).

[Porkchop]

Bich... would that be an 80 or 81 Mazda RX-7

Fun car, my boy has a 79. Love the rotaries!

[PhiSig1071]

I worked with a guy who had one of those. Ran high 10s. Best part was when he got it in a burnout all you would hear is the turbo.

The best sleeper is a GMC Cyclone. 4.3L Turbo with AWD. Looks like an old man truck or an earler version of the S10 Extreme.

Knew another guy with a 1992 V8 S10. Had a 350 pushing about 450hp or so. It literally looked like an old mans truck because it was an old mans truck. Just an old man who has yet to grow up (And is the master of smack talk).

When I bought my bike I *almost* bought a Grand National instead. It was an '87 with a ton of work done, it ran 10 flat on ET Slicks. The guy sent me some pictures of the car, the first one was a launch with both front tires about a foot off the ground. I chose the bike because I would have had to sell my truck to get the Grand National, and I didn't want it as a daily driver.