Anti-German Weasel Spray

[askmrjesus]

It's been a few years since I've been back to Germany. Apparently, since I've been gone, giant, car eating weasels have become quite a problem. So much so, that the plucky Germans have developed a special aerosol spray to keep them at bay:

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/Ikea%20Kitchen/Germany09/DSC_0011.jpg

Armed with my Anti-Giant Weasel spray, I decided to head into town. I'm just not sure if I'm supposed to spray the weasel directly, or just spray some on my jacket, and do my best to pretend that I am not a car. The can offers no instructions in this regard.

Unfortunately, town is surrounded by a giant wall, complete with a moat:

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/Ikea%20Kitchen/Germany09/DSC_0016.jpg (http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/Ikea%20Kitchen/Germany09/DSC_0011.jpg)

Fucking hell. This weasel problem must be worse than I thought. The wall is adorned with slots, undoubtably so the town's inhabitants can shoot flaming Brautwurst at the marauding weasel intruders. Question is, How the fuck do I get in?

Aha! There's a door:

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/Ikea%20Kitchen/Germany09/DSC_0018.jpg

Considering the giant weasel threat, the door seems rather lacking in the security department. I need a beer to calm my nerves. This weasel thing is freaking me right the fuck out.

I make my way to a safe looking cellar, and have a beer that's made by monks, in a brewery that's been making beer since 1050 (AD). This explains two things; Why the beer is so good, and why there are shitfaced monks all over town.

[URL="http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/Ikea%20Kitchen/Germany09/DSC_0002.jpg


Ok, I'm better now. Nine more of these, and I'm just going to forget about the weasels completely.

Off to the Czech Republic in the morning.

I'm taking the weasel spray, just in case...

JC

[Archren]

Where are you guys anyay? That looks an awful lot like Amberg... but then there's a lot of places with walls an moats in Germany. :lol:

Living vicariously through your beer exploits. :drool:

ETA: Apparently the marders don't like American cars.. or maybe they just don't like Oldsmobile flavor.. they never messed with our Bravada in the 2 years we were there. :scratch:

[askmrjesus]

Half way between Nuremberg and Munich, in a town called Weissenburg.

Can't talk now, I'm öff to the the whiskez bar.

JC

[ericr]

Damn! I want to be there again!! Post more pics AMJ, and watch out for the giant weasles.

[Avatard]

Half way between Nuremberg and Munich, in a town called Weissenburg.

You're in Weissenburg, and you're wondering why there's a weasel threat?

:idk:

I'd get the fuck outta weasel town.

[101lifts2]

LOL...funny shit as always AMJ

[Rsv1000R]

You're in Weissenburg, and you're wondering why there's a weasel threat?

:idk:

I'd get the fuck outta weasel town.

That is funny as hell :lol:

[Particle Man]

You're in Weissenburg, and you're wondering why there's a weasel threat?

:idk:

I'd get the fuck outta weasel town.

:lol: well said

[Papa_Complex]

"Note: Marderstop contains 100% synthetic fox urine. Not for topical use."

[Adeptus_Minor]

"Note: Marderstop contains 100% synthetic fox urine. Not for topical use."

But it'd be great for keeping juvenile delinquents off your lawn... ask the old guy who put it in a squirt gun.

[Digifox]

I hate you!!!

Though if you took me to Germany for a week or so I would love you forever ^_~

Would be nice to see where my Great-Great Grand parents where from

[Porkchop]

Would be nice to see where my Great-Great Grand parents where from

Same here. I'm a mutt tho. Only like 1/4 german.

1/2 Polish..... i mean come on, Kopczyk?
1/4 Italian
1/4 German

Yes, thats my last name.... and yes I need to buy a goddamn vowel. :panic:

[rogue]

Same here. I'm a mutt tho. Only like 1/4 german.

1/2 Polish..... i mean come on, Kopczyk?
1/4 Italian
1/4 German

Yes, thats my last name.... and yes I need to buy a goddamn vowel. :panic:

:lmao: :lmao:

How do you pronounce that?

[Particle Man]

But it'd be great for keeping juvenile delinquents off your lawn... ask the old guy who put it in a squirt gun.

hahaha - I remember that from a couple of months ago :lmao:

[Dragonpaco]

Same here. I'm a mutt tho. Only like 1/4 german.

1/2 Polish..... i mean come on, Kopczyk?
1/4 Italian
1/4 German

Yes, thats my last name.... and yes I need to buy a goddamn vowel. :panic:

so all the countries that make delicious sausage teamed up to create you? that is so cool!



With your powers combined I AM CAPTAIN SAUSAGE!

[Archren]

:lmao: :lmao:

How do you pronounce that?

I had a teacher in HS with the last name Bojczuk (pronounced "boy-chuck").. so I imagine it's pronounced "cop-chick"... without the connotation. Correct me if I'm wrong, though, I'm not an expert in Polish names. :lol:

[Porkchop]

How do you pronounce that?
I had a teacher in HS with the last name Bojczuk (pronounced "boy-chuck").. so I imagine it's pronounced "cop-chick"... without the connotation. Correct me if I'm wrong, though, I'm not an expert in Polish names. :lol:

Wow... shes good. But she is only half right. :wink:

In the Polish sense of the word.... yes it is "cop-check" or the lesser "cop-chick". I've heard both from the old farts at the polish club my gram belongs to. Good food there :drool:

In the Americanized sense of the word (that we use)..... it is "cop-sik" or "cop-zik". Pick you poison, its still hard for ppl to read.


so all the countries that make delicious sausage teamed up to create you? that is so cool!

With your powers combined I AM CAPTAIN SAUSAGE!

Your a bastard...... but yes, at the cost of a few bad jokes.... i do love a good keilbasa or polish sausage......

Damnit, que the jokes. :panic:

[smileyman]

This thread :rockout::rockwoot:

[askmrjesus]

Ok, a quick update from Prague.

Despite mz best efforts, there is still some beer left in this town.

There are, however, no vowels.

Zou have to bring zour own. Better bring some wies too. Thez have none here.

The word of the daz is: Velkopopovilchz.

I have no idea what it means, so I!m using it for everzthing now, 9 I saw it on abeer lable0.

JZ

und wifez

[rogue]

Ok, a quick update from Prague.

Despite mz best efforts, there is still some beer left in this town.

There are, however, no vowels.

Zou have to bring zour own. Better bring some wies too. Thez have none here.

The word of the daz is: Velkopopovilchz.

I have no idea what it means, so I!m using it for everzthing now, 9 I saw it on abeer lable0.

JZ

und wifez


:lol: :lol:

[Papa_Complex]

Damned weaselly Germans..... all stealin' vowels and shit.

[HurricaneHeather]

Subscribing ;)

[Particle Man]

Ok, a quick update from Prague.

Despite mz best efforts, there is still some beer left in this town.

There are, however, no vowels.

Zou have to bring zour own. Better bring some wies too. Thez have none here.

The word of the daz is: Velkopopovilchz.

I have no idea what it means, so I!m using it for everzthing now, 9 I saw it on abeer lable0.

JZ

und wifez:lmao:

[Archren]

http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a338/HSman/WinInThisSector.jpg

[askmrjesus]

Prague-

Nice town. A little above and beyond in the overkill department (Let's build a building! No, let's build a HUGE building. No, no, no, Let's build a huge building, put some giant statues on top of it, and paint them GOLD!!!)

So, to sum up, giant buildings and tiny streets.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0066-1.jpg

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0082.jpg

The place is out of control, they've got shit everywhere.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0059.jpg

Right, I almost forgot. Churches. You can't swing a dead pope without hitting one. It's like Disneyland without the rides.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0074.jpg

This is attached to St. Howling Monkey Cathedral-

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0115.jpg

This is either a tomb for a dead saint, or an espresso machine. I'm really not sure.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0088.jpg

Women of Prague:

I did'nt take any pics of the women, but I can describe them to you. They come in two varieties. Impossibly beautiful blonde spinnerettes in pointy boots, and Tractor faced manatees. There seems to be little, if any, middle ground.

Ok, enough of the cultural bullshit, let's drink some beer!

I'm heading an hour West to Plsen, home of Pilsner beer, as soon as I figure out how to turn left.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0054-1.jpg

Pilsner Urquell brewery tour-

Giant copper kettles

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0164.jpg
60,000 bottles a day-

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0144.jpg

Stomp around the cellar for a while-

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0193.jpg


And what do the cheap fuckers give me at the end? A tiny beer in a plastic fucking cup.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0192.jpg

I'm going to Staropramen next time. They have bigger bottles.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk114/hunter900ie/DSC_0137.jpg

JC

[Librarian]

Hey! Bring me back a bottle of that Staropramen. I have a small city in need of beer.

Oh, and BTW, drink one for me while you're there! :rockout:

[Librarian]

Another BTW, drink one for Popcorn. RIP

[Particle Man]

"Tractor faced Manatees" :lol:

[njchopper87]

Great pics. Awesome commentary.

[KSGregman]

Quality post....not jealous of your trip a bit...nope, not at all.

Bastard.

Enjoy!

ps (my daughter thought the St. Howling Monkey Cathedral picture was hilarious...keep up the good work. :lmao: )