Hey Boys!!!
 

FAIL

You're doing it wrong.

That's all. :D

huh? :idk:

Yeah, what he said.

:scratch: er, huh? :confused:

Pms? :)

Someone try to put it in her butt, and she got grumpy maybe?

Nope.

And nope.

Not you, hon :wink:

Don't beat around the bush unless you like that sort of thing and get to the heart of the matter.

Umm... "Yes dear" :?:

good to know :rockwoot:

It's not our fault.

Draw a goddamn arrow or something.

JC

what are you talking a bout AMJ, we don't need directions.

I don't have all fucking day to play "hide the good spot", I've got World Supersport on Tivo.

JC

:lmao:

she talk'n about reps:idk:

last I checked it was the damn women who ate the forbidden fruit... so you all are at the root of all our failure

Alright...which one of yous pissed in the woman's cornflakes?

Nope.

And....

maybe we were bored and decided to eat the fruit so that things would be a little less boring! :lol:

:lmao:

Ding Ding Ding! We have a winner! Johnny, tell her what's she's won!

Is it a Hello Kitty vibrator??? :rockwoot: :lmao:

Would it be better if we acted like we are gods among boys at the horizontal polka? I doubt ya'll would like that much better. At least we aren't overinflated, :lol:

:dvrofl:

:lmao: :lol: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha haha

So I guess that means Trip has access to Femmes? :lol: Noted. :wink:

:lol: I'd say he has access to everything on the site :lmao:

I don't read there unless its to find out why yall are teasing us. But the mods have access if needed to fix issues. No male mods has posting abilities including me.

Speaking of things on this site other's have access to, have you hovered over your rep color and seen what it says about you?? :lmao:

that's yesterday's news :lol:

sweet change isn't it. :D

Hahahahahahahaaa!!!! :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Uh... I still don't get it. :idk:

*sigh*


Typical male


redflip

Whatever you need to believe, doll.
:rolleyes:

Well if you don't get it, then we can't help you. :lol:

Well, -you- can't anyway. :nee:redflip

*eta And we all know that I don't "get it", this has nothing to do with the fact that I don't know what the fuck the point of this thread was supposed to be.

Did somebody put something in the wrong hole?:idk:

I've come to the conclusion that this chick has at least one milliliter too much estrogen in her system. How could anyone in there right mind post something so inane and then have the unmitigated audacity to expect anyone to understand what the fuck she is talking about? It's High School all over again except it's not cute and neither are the participants.:panic:

There are three, maybe four females worth talking to on this board and the rest are here to either babysit their significant others or to make random nuisances of themselves. What, having your own completely private area for this kind of menses wasn't good enough for you? Yeesh...

Come on, you mean that this isn't perfectly clear to you by now?:whistle:

Hmmmm. So the females worth talking too, are only the ones that don't mind your lame attempts at leg humping?

Interesting.

JC

At least she didn't follow it with: "You don't know?!? THEN YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!"

:idk:

:lol:

owned

Just to respond to what I read last night, it wouldn't be fun in here if we all were like I treat my wife with the respect she deserves and listen to her and care about our feelings. We have a sex filled healthy relationship.

When guys start talking like that to other guys, the whole "I think I'm gay" talk comes next, then there is the "yep, I'm gay" speech. (yes stolen from 40 year old virgin) :lol:

Thread fail!!!

:lmao:

Have you heard him during locker room talk? :lol:

:rofl:

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1148/...37740832fc.jpg



:panic: no way!!!!

"Here Kitty Kitty Kitty...."


JUST KIDDING!! I don't have and don't want one of these!!!

Some women just have no desire. The day I got a vasectomy, she didn't want sex anymore. She wanted more kids and I didn't. I don't ever watch porn, or surf the web at all when I am at home. She is a spoiled housewife who doesn't work and I take care of all of her needs, she just doesn't take care of mine. Evey ones situation is different so you cant judge and say she's not giving it up because you suck in bed or you are an asshole. She just has no desire because we can't procreate anymore. It's not that I never get it but once a month is no where near how much I want it. Might as well be nothing compared to the 7 times a day we did it before we had kids.

you can poke fun at anyone now though, without them taking it serious.

Ok man, on that I just want to give you a hug... that sucks ass.

You are right in that I can't judge because I don't know the situation BUT if you ask me there is a HUGE communication breakdown here. :idk:

You spoil her. Neither of you has taken the time or effort to effectively communicate your wants and needs in this relationship (and I'm not just talking sex here). :(

holy crap :lmao:

The best advice I ever heard my mom give was when she told my wife that to have a good marriage, you have to keep your man happy to not make him want to stray, she went into more detail than I just did though. It was hilarious, because A is a very shy person in public about that type of stuff, especially with family.

hahahaha my wife would want to crawl under the couch and hide if that happened

Oh it's even worse that the mods are reading what they've said on a "girlie thread" and are commenting on it in a round about way here...

Anyway, "leg humping" was something that I never did in the past but I kinda warmed up to it lately. If someone had a problem with it all they had to do was put me on "ignore" or even *gasp* pm me and ask me to stop. No biggie. Instead they bitch about leg humping in a private thread and then drag it over here in a vague, weak attempt at humor.

I can't speak for everyone that participates in "leg humping" but personally, I've engaged in it jokingly without any real malice of any kind. If you'll notice, there are several of you that I've never made any lewd remarks to of any kind, so I'm not sure why you're complaining.:idk: Some people think that it's fun, some think that it's rude, and some people seem to think that it's cool to jump from one side to the other whenever it suits her.

Whatever. I am more than happy to cease "leg humping" if Trip wishes to impose such a rule. Quite frankly, I actually thought that I'd done a decent job of distinguishing between those that play and those that don't.

:lol:

This thread isn't about you tigger or leghumping. It's teasing the married guys on the forum, because we had been complaining about not getting any after tying the knot.

Don't take it personally, it's all in a joking manner.

well hell... I'm not getting any and I'm single... blah!

Tig dear, you just painted a big bulls eye on you when you offended some of our feminine sensitivities with your maleness...thank gawd I knew you were kidding or I'D have ripped into you...:lol:

Keep on with your bad self...if someone has a problem it will be addressed as needed, or Trip will just ban everyone. :wink:

You just have to up the amount you're willing to pay.

:lmao: :lmao:


:lmao: :lmao:

Damn. That's sad. :(

that's in the fine print....

I got it a lot after we got married. We were married 5 years before we had kids and those 5 years were fantastic.

the buttons move

That is true though. I used to work the door at a strip club and I'd see these guys come in every week searching for even the smallest, pathetic scrap of sexual attention. It never ceases to amaze me when a woman is so incredibly outraged that her husband cheated on her, when it's later learned that she hasn't had sex with him for months. It's like the old "sex stops after marriage" jokes, it just proves that the woman wasn't really attracted to the man sexually in the first place if that were to happen. Seriously, every woman I've ever been with has said that "the sex is incredibly better when you love each other". What greater way to absolutely prove that you love someone than to dedicate the rest of your life to them? If anything you should be getting laid MORE after marriage, not less.:idk:

dude, the buttons occasionally pack their shit and leave for a while

THAT post makes it even more funny...

How big is YOUR ego that you would think all the chicks on this site would be specifically talking about you in closed doors. :lol: SO not even close to about you.

But, [pats on head] look at you go...

Yea, you know it's all in good fun! Heck, there's only ever been one girl on this forum that I've ever had any real interest in and she knows who she is.

Besides, I mostly just like to stir things up once in a while. I kinda inherited Trip's spot from the old place because he has to be more admin like now! :lol:

That's why all my girlfriends (ok, hookers) are mute amputees. Sure, I'll never get a handjob from them, but none of those bitches will talk behind my back.

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

It's all peachy fucking keen until your husband starts asking (nay, shaming) you to have threesomes and let him have an "open relationship" (which is fine for people who are into that.. but I'm not one of those people).. yeah, my ex didn't mention that part BEFORE we tied the knot. But it's so much deeper than that.. I know of things he did in his past.. and well, the thought of him touching me made me ill after a while. :lol: So yeah, you're right, he probably cheated on me because I didn't want to have sex with him, but fuck it, I was justified. :nee:

I met him and i din't want to have sex with him either

Shhh... I'm trying to stir some shit up..... besides, I got pm's about it and someone else mentioned it before me... Anyway, I'm trying to have some fun here!

BTW I do realize that some of you are actually slamming the guys on this forum whose wives aren't having sex with them. I think that's despicable personally. I'm sorry to single you out, but Ed is one of the most honorable and faithful husbands I have ever had the pleasure to meet. He won't even discuss going to a strip bar and very seldom gets involved in some of the more lewd portions of this board. Lessor men would have already had a girl on the side or have packed their belongings. Heck, this woman has even kept him from one of the greatest pleasures of his life, motorcycling! He is a good man and doesn't deserve derision of any kind public or private.

Who's Ed?

Rider ;)

Ahhh okay.

Um...if you knew about these things then why the fuck did you marry him? Are you stupid or did you fail to get to know him before you tied the knot?, which would actually be pretty stupid in itself. Oh don't tell me you're one of these women who marry men thinking that they'll "fix them"....:lol:

You can live with a person for years and not really know them. Also, people change naturally. They get new ideas, like new things, change their minds about other shit. :idk:

Anyone ever heard of this book? Seriously funny read that both women AND men should read. Such a funny look at relationships.

Just remember to keep your wives and husbands spayed or neutered.

Reading comprehension FTW, dude. Go back and look at the part where I said "he didn't mention that part BEFORE we tied the knot."

Yea but she said that she "knew about things in his past" which caused her not to want to have sex with him. I understand that you'll never know EVERYTHING about another person but this sounds pretty basic to me.:idk:

Hey Tigs not to burst your bubble but I did stray once... Not in person but I carried on a short term online thing for a little while with one woman. It didn't work out which was best for both of us. I'm back on the straight an narrow though. But yeah, I never go to strip clubs hang out at bars with female friends or any other nonsense. Oh and the lewd topics.... I mostly avoid because of work. I swear like a longshoreman and I've been to Thailand so so there is nothing that offends me. LOL

quoted for hilarity :lmao:

:lmao:okaaaaaaaaaaaay then

I know someone in your exact situation. It amazes me what some people will do to the people they are supposed to love the most. :sorry: That really sucks.

Writing composition FTW, chick. You said that he didn't mention wanting to have three ways, etc before marriage. You stated that "you KNEW things about his past that made you not want to have sex with him" not that you later DISCOVERED things about him that caused you to no longer wish to have sex with him. Besides, most women don't want to know where you've been in the past sexually, did you ask him about his sexual history and he lied to you? Did you divulge your entire sexual history to him unsolicited? Anyway, I hope that you learned your lesson and actually get to know your partners from now on before you haphazardly engage in a union that's supposed to be for life.

qft!

Right, so it's MY fault he was a douchebag who was emotionally and physically abusive. Right-o, noted.

Well, I didn't say you were a saint! You're a good guy Ed, and I honestly admire you! So shut the fuck up!:wink: BTW I still think you should go buy another bike!

I'm working on that. I think the sad pathetic look on my face on nice days here are getting to her. :rockwoot:

NO! It's your fault that you didn't find this out before you married him! I know people can "change" and that they hide things but their fundamental nature is there to find if you hard enough. People overlook these "quirks" and make excuses for this type of behavior from their mates long before it gets to your stage. I don't believe that his "douchebaggedness" was completely undetectable before you married him. You probably overlooked it because he had other more positive traits thinking that you could put up with his faults because of them. :idk:

You're right, to single him out would be wrong and despicable. We didn't do that - and haven't to anyone on this forum behind closed doors. Most of the women on here would call you out here rather than talk about it back there :lol: We were referring in a general sense, as it's happened more than once [closer to eleventy billion times] that men refer to getting married as the sex-stopper.

I've been leaving bike mags around the house to wear my wife down too :lol:

Nope.

I knew him before they married. He's VERY charming.... hindsight sees him as almost a predator. Almost.

I agree, I didn't take it as a poke at me personally. It was a general comment about the large number of men that complain about the frequency of sex.

Sex after marriage doesn't stop, it just changes. Instead of no holds barred, break the bed, aerobic style sex, you just wait till she sleeps, put your penis on her cheek, take a picture and jerk off to it later.

God I'm so glad I'm not attached and don't want to be!

Relationship drama is complete BULLSHIT!!!!


:lol: :lol:

Hahahahahaaa!!!! :lmao:

You must have overloaded on Flinstone vitamins this morning! :rofl:

Goddamn double standards.
Let me see if I get this straight:
Women ALWAYS change after marriage and men NEVER do.

Ok. Got it. Thanks.

I was 20 when I married him. He was 41. Yeah, I was pretty naive back then, and he took advantage of that. The worst stuff I didn't find out until a couple years later, after we'd had kids.. at that point I felt stuck. :idk:

Okay but the OP titled this thread "Hey Boys!!! You aren't doing it right! Which implies that he and the other married men on this forum who aren't getting laid are being rejected through some fault of their own. Or am I failing "reading comprehension 101" once again?

And FWIW, Tracy will tell you we don't have a problem with sex (although we're not married YET)... other than that whole 400 mile distance thing during the week. :lol: :D