I knew that first one had to be fake...wtf...spanking the monkey with chit everywhere...wiping chit up with your shirt and putting it back on ? Dayum !!
I work on the 58th floor of a building and have worked in high rises for 20 + years and have thought how much it would suck to get stuck in an elevator over a weekend.
I've never been stuck more than 3 or 4 minutes in an elevator and that has only been once or twice in my life.