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Old 01-12-2009, 04:10 PM   #1
OneSickPsycho
Ride Like an Asshole
 
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Join Date: Feb 2008
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Posts: 11,254
Default OSP's Mini-Bike Mayhem

At the bar the other night... a guy I BS with sometimes in there who is a member of a local stunt team says he has his lil' stunt mini-bike out in his van and is thinking about pissing around with it in the parking lot. A few gin and tonics later, we're out there... and he's rockin' circle wheelies and stoppies and such.

Intrigued by the little machine, I ask him to take it around the parking lot. Made it about 50 feet... Turned, bike started washing out, caught, and I high-sided. It was ugly.

Laying there I was laughing at my stupidity for a second... then I tried to get up. Knee buckled and I knew something was very wrong. Knee felt like a balloon full of rocks... I dragged myself over to the curb, straightened out my leg (which hurt very much bad). Ambulance arrived and I'm in the ER within a half hour.

Sit around the ER for a little while... pain not much of a factor, until knee is moved. Go to X-ray... Knee cap shattered into 3 big pieces and doc expects there to be a bunch more that cannot be seen directly. Now I have to wait to be sent to another hospital for surgery. All in all... I sat in the ER for 13.5 hours, until being transferred. They did have me doped up every couple hours with some Dilaudid, which was nice.

Long story short, 24 hours after getting to the new hospital, I'm prepped for surgery. I remember getting the 'cocktail', then waking up in the recovery room. I don't remember getting wheeled to my room, but I woke up next to some guy who was like 10,000 years old and was a snoring machine. Four screws and a bunch of wire, I am together.

The incident happend around 1am on Thursday... I got out of the hospital around 1pm yesterday. I get to lay on my couch for like 2 weeks until my follow-up visit... and there's no guarantee I am going to be cleared to return to work at that time. Estimated recovery time... 3 months.

At least I learned a few things...
1) I'm still a dumbass
2) Fat guys have no business on mini-bikes
3) Alcohol and two wheels don't mix, regardless of how small those wheels are
4) If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough.
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