Why did the Chicken cross the road???

Ducati Diva · 10-16-2008, 02:46 PM

Why did the chicken cross the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it

was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road

because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and

dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the

road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally

helped that little chicken to cross the road. This

experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right

from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the

chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really

isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the

chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the

chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is

either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground

here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can

clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the

road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that

chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross

the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to

cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions.

I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need

some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken

won't realize that he must first deal with the problem

on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on

the other side of the road... What we need to do is help him

realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his

current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having

problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad.

So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and

take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give

this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road

and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because

he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he

walks.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way

that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the

Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped

to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider

information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross

it with a toad? Did he cross it with a hare? Did he cross

it with a bear? Didhe check if the road was hot? I kinda

doubt it, I think not! Yes, the chicken crossed the road,

but why it crossed, I've not been told. Just one more

thing I have to say, it's been bugging me to this very

day. If the Chicken is a she, why do we keep saying HE?

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't

you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it

the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is

gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too.

I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this

abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with

seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.'

That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as

plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken

crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the

road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few

moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the

first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a

serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its

lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the
road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world

crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which

will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your

important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet

Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new

platform is much more stable and will never cra.....

.#@&&^(C%..........reboot !

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road,

or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

the chi · 10-16-2008, 03:02 PM

holy crap, thats just funny! Much needed today!!

smileyman · 10-16-2008, 03:05 PM

Good stuff...

And the Stephen Hawking version - "the chicken didn't actuall cross the road. It's molecules were reformed on a different time/space plane due to Quantum inconsistencies."

and the Chris Smiley version "OH SHIT! It's in my lane!"

BobTheBiker · 10-16-2008, 03:57 PM

and then my version: OH SHIT! too late to stop. HONEY! we's havin chicken tonight!

Carolina · 10-16-2008, 04:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BobTheBiker

and then my version: OH SHIT! too late to stop. HONEY! we's havin chicken tonight!

lol

yes like rae said very funny

good post

Shift · 10-16-2008, 05:16 PM

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

:na:

Well fuck u Cheney I thought it was the best one myself.

fnfalman · 10-17-2008, 08:52 AM

Sarah Palin: Either the chicken crosses the road or I'm gonna shoot it down from the helicopter with a high-powered rifle.

Mr Lefty · 10-17-2008, 04:23 PM

Obama: Look... I can endure attacks as to why I cross the road... but really... we need to be talking about things that matter... and that's the condition of the road.

smileyman · 10-17-2008, 04:33 PM

Ebbs the chicken cares not for tire choice or air pressure adjustments...He sees an opening and goes for it!

Mr Lefty · 10-17-2008, 04:42 PM

more like...

Ebbs... well I tried to cross the road... but... well... I looped my bike

10-16-2008, 02:46 PM	#1
Ducati Diva just learning Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: western nc Moto: 1996 M900 Posts: 1,348	Why did the Chicken cross the road??? Why did the chicken cross the road? BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change! JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE: I invented the chicken. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road... What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Did he cross it with a hare? Did he cross it with a bear? Didhe check if the road was hot? I kinda doubt it, I think not! Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told. Just one more thing I have to say, it's been bugging me to this very day. If the Chicken is a she, why do we keep saying HE? ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..... .#@&&^(C%..........reboot ! ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one? Last edited by Ducati Diva; 10-16-2008 at 02:51 PM..

10-16-2008, 03:05 PM	#3
smileyman White Trash Hero Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: NW Arkansas Moto: Buell 1125R Porco Rosso Edition Posts: 4,895	Good stuff... And the Stephen Hawking version - "the chicken didn't actuall cross the road. It's molecules were reformed on a different time/space plane due to Quantum inconsistencies." and the Chris Smiley version "OH SHIT! It's in my lane!" __________________ Arkriders.com To be the best you must first be willing to risk the worst!

10-17-2008, 08:52 AM	#7
fnfalman Europhile Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: SoCal Moto: Aprilia RS125, Aprilia SR50 Factory, Aprilia Tuono, BMW Rockster, KTM 990 Adventure Posts: 1,875	Sarah Palin: Either the chicken crosses the road or I'm gonna shoot it down from the helicopter with a high-powered rifle. __________________ *Cogito Ergo Vroom - I think therefore I ride*

10-17-2008, 04:33 PM	#9
smileyman White Trash Hero Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: NW Arkansas Moto: Buell 1125R Porco Rosso Edition Posts: 4,895	Ebbs the chicken cares not for tire choice or air pressure adjustments...He sees an opening and goes for it! __________________ Arkriders.com To be the best you must first be willing to risk the worst!

10-16-2008, 03:57 PM	#4
BobTheBiker too much time on my hands Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: the northern district of god damn Moto: 01 ZX6R, looking for more now. Posts: 1,802	and then my version: OH SHIT! too late to stop. HONEY! we's havin chicken tonight!

10-16-2008, 05:16 PM	#6
Shift Just a Noob Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Pensacola, FL Moto: 08 Green 6R Posts: 421	DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? :na: Well fuck u Cheney I thought it was the best one myself.

10-17-2008, 04:23 PM	#8
Mr Lefty TWFix Legend Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Denver CO Moto: 01 BMW F650GS Dakar Posts: 15,677	Obama: Look... I can endure attacks as to why I cross the road... but really... we need to be talking about things that matter... and that's the condition of the road.

10-17-2008, 04:42 PM	#10
Mr Lefty TWFix Legend Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Denver CO Moto: 01 BMW F650GS Dakar Posts: 15,677	more like... Ebbs... well I tried to cross the road... but... well... I looped my bike